Weight?

My weight has always been an issue for me. Like so many other people out there, I'm unhappy about the way I look and weigh. I'm not always unhappy about it. Sometimes I love the way I look. Sometimes I think I look hot, sexy, interesting, different, cool, neat, nice, beautiful, calm, clean... and so on. But every once in a while I do something or hear something and think, wow I'm gross.
Now... I know I'm not thin, never really have been, but I've also not considered myself fat. I'm overweight, but not fat... It's weird. My BMI tells me I'm overweight (actually it says I'm fucking fat...).
I follow other peoples blogs. Some of the ones I follow are about people losing weight. And some of those people are pro-ana. I'm clearly not, with my rolls of fat... but some of them are. I've wondered what I would look like if I was thin. Not a happy thought process (because you always end up back to the present and I'm not thin...). I'm going to stop my constant complaining now...
I live at home and have never made supper for only me. I always make it for me and someone (my sister or mother). So what I make isn't always healthy. I don't want to start buying healthy stuff because then they will comment on it. I very much dislike it when they comment on something I change. Especially when I'm self conscious of it. What should I do?