A sisters life

So I'm not really supposed to talk about my family on this blog, not because they or anybody I know reads it, but because I feel like if I say something "wrong" it'll come back to bite me in the ass. But since this topic is related to me (emotions). What I mean is, if she (my sister) is unhappy, it "rubs" off on me.

So what's going on with her is she's unhappy. She's annoyed by the fact that she isn't going anywhere right now. She's between jobs and gets financial support from the government. But in return (for the support) she has to go to these "classes" everyday. She hates them. The people who work there, the "students" and the whole concept.

What bugs me about her right now is that she's taking it out on us (mother and I). She gets mad about the littlest things and spends most of her time in her room. She isn't social, which is one of those things you would normally categorize her as. She's: nice, friendly, social, has leadership qualities.... and so on. But now, as said, she spends her time in her room.

How this affects me most is the constant negative things being said around me. People at school complain about other students and now at the house, she complains about mother and mother complains about her... I'm not sure how much more of this I can live with. I feel like I'm going to explode on somebody... then I'll have to say sorry and people wouldn't act the same around me again. So that is not an option. But I also hate confronting people. It's not something I do very often, because I don't ever get to the point where I'd have to say sorry or confront people. I'm nice like that ^^

So what do I do? Do I suck it up and confront them or do I wait it out? If I suck it up, do I talk to her or to both of them at the same time? Do I also confront my issues on confrontation?

Small Living 1

          So I was googling different apartments that don't need a lot of space (for when I move). And found the website faircompaines.com, which has a tag for small living. So I'm going to write a few blogs dedicated to small living.

I'm starting with this very cute, quaint and rural living-area.
Now I really like this house/caravan. I like that it nice and clean (which I can't say about my own room...) and it has so much wood panelling. I also love that it has all that sitting (aka two sofas).
And like every other adult, I like that it has a "normal" sized bed.
There are some things I dislike about the house though. And that's the fact that the microwave is on the other side of the room and easily seen. I like thing to be out of the way, especially big things that don't match the decor.
Other things that were a bit off was that the host doesn't comment on the sofas. Is there storage under them, like the one in this video (p.s I plan to make that video the next blog too).
     This house (15 square meters) is actually 5 meters bigger than my current room is (mine is 2,5m by 4m = 10 square meters). Small differences... like the shape of the room, the cabinets, the doors, the concept that the house has a kitchen and bathroom... My room is stupidly made. When you look at it, you can clearly see what you're supposed to put where.

So this a quick sketch of my room. The black fuzz is the door (but the fuzz is a little small...). The purple is a closet (that can't be painted and the inside is unmovable) The red (at the bottom) is a radiator. And the blue is a windowsill.
As you can see, they want you to put a desk or table-thing in front of the window and a bed along the left side wall.
In my room there isn't room to put a sofa in it, unless it's a futon. But I'm too old for a ugly looking futon and if I buy one that's pretty and mature, it costs!! Now my room also has a sh*tload of books in it too. I have close to 400 books. And my mother doesn't want to see them (aka they have to be in my room).

Maybe you guys can help my decorate the inside of my room. Do any of you guys have any ideas? Or advise?

Blogs....

I follow quite a few blogs, some on blogger (which I read on google reader) and some on bloglovin. When I saw a few, I mean about 30 different blogs... :) 
I follow different types of blogs too, thank god, right? I read fashion blogs, style blogs, proana blogs, philosophy blogs, psychology blogs, "thought" blogs, book review blogs, LGBT blogs, cooking blogs, game blogs and so on.
I like the different blogs and love to read things that make one think. For example I read about yuri (lesbian) movies, and decided to watch "But I'm a cheerleader". Not a bad movie, but not really a good movie either. It's about a girl, who gets sent to a "rehab for homosexuals" place. She didn't know she was a lesbian when she was sent there, but found out on the "journey to being normal". I'm not sure what year it's from, but it's got female/male roles, that they have to relearn. For example the main character and the other girls that are there have to learn how to cook, clean and care for their husbands. The males on the other hand have to learn to be manly and know manly things, like fixing a car. It's entertaining, but not something I'd watch sober again. Might watch it with friends while having a couple of drinks.

My high heel collection

Here are all the high heels I own (aka my collection).

The shoes I talked about in the last blog. Now in picture ^^ (the Peggy Plaid Pumps)
As you can see, they are plaid and red/white/black. So cute! I plan to (at some point in time) buy a 40's/60's dress that matches.

Here are the yellow/white/black ones, that are the same as the red... but yellow XD
I haven't made plans like with the red ones, mostly because I think these look very cute with jeans.

I got these ones in Føtex for about 150,- (fyi: ",-" stands for kroner in Danish, 100 Danish Krone is about 17 US Dollars).
They don't fit my foot all that well (in the arch). But they look awesome (almost hooker-ish, but cool).

These short heels are my most worn, because they aren't very high and they look cool. I wear them with every type of pant I own and love the pointed toe look these give. They can also be worn for long periods of time because of the height of the heel.








Now these are the pride of my collection. They are the most comfortable high heels I have ever worn. I can wear these for hours on end without any pain. I got them supper cheap (at a discount store in Copenhagen), payed 200,- for them. I also wore these to Heimdal (my prom).

 Although these are a "classic" pair of black heels, they are about a size too small for me :(
I got them from a friend and never got around to getting ride of these classics.










These Iron Fist shoes are the cream-de-la-cream in cute/punk looking shoes. They, like the Peggy Plaid Pumps are a specific type of high heel and take awhile to get used to (if you tend to walk with the tip of your feet, you can't do it with these).
These shoes are still beautiful. They have skulls on the front of them and they have silver "stones/jewels" on the sides, as you can see from the photo.

I don't wear these that often, mostly because they pinch at the front, but they are supper cute and I love them. If I wore them more, they would stop pinching, but for now... blister here I come!









Also got these cute summer shoes are Føtex for about 50,-
They say they are a size 41 (9½-10 US), but they feel like a 39/40... Cute though.

Shoes shoes shoes

So I promised a post about shoes, and here it is:
I have, like every other female, an adoration to shoes. I don't own all that many, but I like them all the same. I resently bought 2 pars of peggy plaid pump, 1 in yellow and 1 in red. They are so cute. Not "my style" but still very cute. The next par of heels I plan to buy are going to be a everyday type, something I could wear everyday to school and around town. Be able to walk over 6 km each day, type of heel (so not very high). Most of the heels I own are a good 10 cm (4") high. Which in the long road are hard to walk with.
But in all reality I should probably not buy any more and save for an apartment instead... But that's not fun...

Apartment thoughts

So... at some point of time I plan to move out of my mothers house and live on my own, like any other person my age. I'm actually behind in the race to be independent. I like the thought that all the money I get (minus rent) gets to be used on whatever I feel like. For example shoes (in reference to the next post I plan to make). But this post is about some of the thoughts I've got on how I'd decorate an apartment. Well, more like how it'd be set up.
First off I'd like to say that the first apartment I'd end up getting won't be very big... maybe around 30m^2 (square meters). Which is an okay size for ones first here in Denmark. Now... What I've been thinking is that I need lots of shelf space. So I was thinking of covering a wall with shelves.

 One of them could have a table in it, like this one (p.s all of them are from Ikea).

Then, you'd have one of these (and you can add "doors" to each square, if you wanted)










Then you'd have these, but lay them down so that you can put things on top of them.





And last but not least is this cool computer table. It can fit up to a 17" computer. It closes so that you can e.g eat on it without having to move your computer. Smart, right?

How fights can get brutal

Comments: "mother"/"my mother"/"mom"/"that woman" - whatever YOU call your mother has nothing to do with me. If I refer to her as something (e.g mother) and not as something else (e.g my mother/mom), that is my business, not yours. And no, I do not call her mother to her face, she is called "mom".

The day started off like normal. I'm told what to do and I do it. But then my mother leaves to see a movie and my sister "takes" the parenting position. First off, I won't mind that she does it, if she was good at it! Secondly, I'm older! Why does she think she can take that position, just because mother is out?

So now SHE is telling ME what to do! SHE has NO right to tell me what to do. Mother told me what to do and I did as mother said. SHE can't ADD on to what mother told me to do!

Mother told us not to be on the computer or watch tv until what we agreed upon was done (aka I was told to clean the kitchen). Anywho... Mother leaves, sister goes on computer (she is not done what was asked of her yet) and tells me I'm not done, so I'm not allowed to watch tv,

I ask her: "What am I missing?". And she lists a long list of things, that I had done, just not up to HER standers. They are however up to my mothers. I tell her she has got to be kidding me! And then ignore everything she says (childish, I know... but it works the best). She gets angry! Starts yelling at me about something to do with yesterday... I didn't go out drinking with my friends, and that apparently ruined her plans. So she is angry...

She then tells me to go to my room. WTF? She tells me because her plans were ruined I have to stay in my room all day, so that she can have the house to herself. WTF? How is any of this MY problem? Of course, I say NO! And she gets even more angry. She then tries to take my key (to my door) and I shove her away. She now so angry that her face is red, HITS ME! Punches me. Repetitively. And I push her away, which does nothing because her anger has to come out, and it's coming out in punches on me!

Mother is still at the movies and I now have a shitload of bruises... and one scratch mark. About an hour before mother comes home, she calls her. And tells her I started it. That I hit her first...

Oh yay, did I remember to tell you that she hates the fact that I'm alive? And she wishes that I stayed with my father, so mother and her would have a nice life here alone. She wishes that I didn't have money, friends, things or a family... To say those things to a person, who you have no idea what's going on with. You have NO right to say such things! I've considered suicide in the past, and saying such things aren't fun to hear.

Now I have no idea what to do... about my sister... or my relationship with my mother...